Ayu

Hahaha…that was my first reaction when I saw a picture of
Miss

Indonesia in a bright orange bikini on the front page of a newspaper.

It seems the controversial debate about being Indonesian
with all of its eastern culture in an international so-called brain, beauty and
behaviour contest has risen again…..and I guess it’s a trend that may continue
throughout the coming years.

Personally, I don’t have any objections to Miss Universe
being held. I suppose it is just like one of those quizzes where the best gets
to be the winner…and the winner takes it all….fame and fortune.

However, as I understand……in this contest, there is a
mission that the winner must carry. This winner must set a good example as a
woman to other women out there and also to (not a girl – not yet a woman) little
girls out there who are watching. Now I don’t really know what the exact
objectives of the contest are as I am already occupied with other useful things
to worry about, but I must admit that I do have some concerns regarding that
responsibility one has to carry when a woman is entered to this competition.

When a woman joins this contest, she becomes a
representative of ‘herself’….and ‘the country’ she represents. I suppose Artika
did a very good representation of

Indonesia

’s friendly culture and
she really has brains. She even got to the top 15 (eh…15 ato 10 sih??) ….when
she didn’t show her belly buttons like the other candidates….which proves…..the
judges were quite objective as they did not mind not seeing her ‘bared beauty’
in bikini…..though I must say I was quite disappointed with her nightgown. With Nadine….ok, she is beautiful…the camera likes her, the
eyes of the male species wouldn’t mind eyeing her up and down all day…..but
that’s all I can say about her.

With the most recent one…(mm, I forgot her name….Puri, Putri…can’t
be bothered to browse and look it up, sorry)…..I don’t know, I mean I haven’t
been watching the contest,……but, she seems to represent ‘herself’ more in order
to win instead of representing our beloved country. Ok, I don’t know what she
says in the interview and I think she looks clever enough not to call Indonesia
a ‘city’…….but the way she wore that orange bikini just doesn’t look Indonesian….or
does it?? Mungkin dia lupa….di Indoland…..pake pakean minim didepan publik is considered as
VERY impolite?

I saw her mother being interviewed and if I’m not mistaken……she
said she was worried at first but decided that it was ok because her daughter
is doing this in order to win the contest for Indonesia….so she can represent
Indonesia…..

Nonetheless honey…….that orange bikini doesn’t represent
Indonesia…..it simply represents yourself wanting to flaunt your womanly figure
just like the other contestants….if you wish to represent ‘yourself’ and ‘Indonesia’
at the same time……why didn’t you just wear bikini made of our traditional
batik???????? It would look more awkwardly Indonesian…. =)

 
*inspired by one of my students who said that in the future……there
will be batik bikinis….what a clash of culture ya…..hehehe

Fears….we all have that, don’t we?

Fear of needles, fear of height, fear of rubber bands (that’s my mum), fear of darkness, fear of needles (ok that’s personal), fear of the opposite sex (hahaha….kasian deh lu)…et cetera etcetera…..

Although not all of us will admit it and others may not even realize it as a fear. Well….whichever……it is fear!

There is another type of fear……. where you are stuck in the moment…..with no power to return and no strength to carry on…… you wish the ground would suck you in and the sky will lift you up and take you somewhere where no one will find you…….to a place where the time could stand still forever so you can forget yesterday and not think about tomorrow. Now isn’t that a very dramatic description of what fear of living is…..hehehe

I am no psychologist….but I guess some people who suffer from the fear of living will show signs of saying, “Right, I believe everything is destined by God, so all I have to do is pray for it to come to me……if it’s my destiny, it won’t go anywhere (alias gak akan kemana….ya…a very popular saying don’t u think?).”

Well dears, if God just wanted us to wait and see……to wait and be fed like a baby with everything life has to offer…..why do you think he created our so-called brains? There must be some sort of reasons why we are all blessed with that delicate but amazing thing called ‘the brain’…..and the reason is one…..it is created and placed there…..to be used of course. Manusia dikasi akal buat berpikir (ain’t we so grateful we are not animals….?)….….buat cari jalan keluar dari masalah….and of course…the alternatives exist…..untuk yang bener2 mau mencari….pasti ada aza deh jalan keluarnya…..kayak usaha orang yg jemput rezeki…ya gak ya gak….sok wise yah daku….hehehe

Subhanallah, isn’t God so generous……He even gives us choices to make even when He already knows what is best for us…..He has shown us all of the good things in life and given us the authority to choose what is good for us…..yet we seem to prefer to pretend to be blind sometimes…..opting for what is less right for us…..simply because we know it would be safer that way…Yep….not knowing the truth….is sometimes safer…..than facing the truth (I’m just being honest…..you don’t have to admit that you agree ;p). I’m afraid of facing the truth sometimes….but the truth is out there(jadi inget jaman X-Files) to be discovered….so why not let it expose itself….

Ok….let’s walk with our heads high, but keep our feet on the ground…..and face the wonderful and challenging things life has to offer…..

To have fear is perfectly normal…..it makes us perfectly human….but to run away from that fear….can be called an irresponsible act of facing your fear of living……I guess we should face that fear, use our so called brains to overcome it and use our heart to believe that everything happens for a reason…..

The trials from God exist because they are lessons in life to make us mentally stronger and wiser so that we can teach our younger generations one day…….and no trial is given to those who are incapable of overcoming them……

That’s how great God is….HE….who knows everything…HE…who knows everything will come to you at the right time….for those who have patience….for those who are never tired of making efforts in obtaining their goals in life….for those who believe…..

=)

*somebody said this once……”Hidup itu memang susah….kalo gak mau susah….ya gak usah hidup”…hehehe……

to all my friends who are getting married very soon :

Kita semua adalah malaikat-malaikat dengan satu sayap…….
dan kita bisa terbang jika kita saling berpelukan…….

(Liciano De Crescenzo)

‘Relationships are like Rome.

Difficult to start out, incredible during prosperity of the Golden Age…..and unbearable during the fall.

Then, a new kingdom will come along and the whole process will repeat itself…….until you come across a kingdom….like Egypt….that thrives, and continues to flourish.

This kingdom will become your best friend, your soul mate, and your love.’

-Helen Keller-

*which reminds me of a conversation between Fahri and Maria in the movie ‘Ayat-Ayat Cinta’….jodoh itu seperti Mesir dengan Sungai Nil nya…….

Time….

too slow for those who wait….

too swift for those who fear….

too long for those who grieve….

too short for those who rejoice….

but for those who love,….

Time is……Eternity……

*bukan….bukan sedang demam Ayat Ayat Cinta !

I don’t know who wrote this but…..I like it….

for those who are in search of a true friend for life……not just someone to share the bed……

jika ia sebuah cinta, ia tidak mendengar…
namun senantiasa bergetar….

jika ia sebuah cinta…..ia tidak buta..
namun senantiasa melihat dan merasa..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak menyiksa..
namun senantiasa menguji..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak memaksa..
namun senantiasa berusaha..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak cantik atau tampan..
namun senantiasa menarik..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak datang dengan kata-kata..namun senantiasa menghampiri dengan hati..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak terucap dengan kata..namun senantiasa hadir dengan sinar mata..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak hanya berjanji..namun senantiasa mencoba memenangi..

jika ia sebuah cinta…ia mungkin tidak suci..
namun senantiasa tulus..

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak hadir karena permintaan..namun hadir karena ketentuan…

jika ia sebuah cinta….. ia tidak hadir dengan kekayaan dan kebendaan…
namun hadir karena pengorbanan dan kesetiaan..

Dan Jika Kau Tlah Memiliki CINTA
Jagalah dengan setulus hati
Sirami dengan kasih yang tulus
Sinari dengan kasih yang sejati

Biarlah cinta tumbuh
Biarlah berkembang
Peluklah dengan erat
Jangan biarkan cinta itu hilang

Rasakanlah dalam hidupmu
Rasakanlah hangatnya dalam hati
Biarlah ia memberi warna dalam hidup
Biarlah ia memberi arti kehidupan

Manakala ..
Kau kehilangan cinta
Janganlah menangis karenanya
Tutuplah kisah cinta yang lama

Simpanlah sebagai kenangan
Bahwa cinta itu ada
Bahwa kau pernah merasakannya

Tetapi ….

Jangan tutup hatimu
Untuk cinta yang baru
Yang akan mengisi hari - harimu
Dengan bahagia yang baru
Dengan kepedihan yang baru
Dengan arti yang baru

Namun ..
Jika kau merasa tak ada cinta di hati
Jangan katakan tak ada cinta
Jangan kau ingkari adanya cinta
Jangan kau bunuh cinta itu
Tapi…

Cairkan hatimuyang beku
Bukalah mata hatimu
Singkirkan karang yang menghalang
Hingga akhirnya

Kau dapat melihat
Kau dapat merasakan
Apa arti sebuah cinta
Sebab..

Tak ada yang tak punya cinta
Kita dilahirkan
Berdasarkan cinta

Kita dilahirkan
Dengan penuh cinta
Jika kau mulai merasakan cinta
Jangan kau pendam cinta itu

Tunjukkanlah dengan lembut
Berikan perhatian dengan kesungguhan
Buatlah agar dia mengerti
Bahwa kau sungguh mencintai

Buatlah dia sadar
Bahwa kau sungguh menyayangi
Dan ingatlah selalu
Jangan kau memberikan cinta dengan
paksa

Sadarlah…
Tak selamanya cinta bersambut
Tak selamanya cinta memiliki
Dan berbahagialah
Jika kau telah menunjukkan cintamu .

From : http://www.hanyawanita.com

Dear Mr. Wilder,

Finding difficulties in understanding and interpreting the holy book is experienced also when reading other holy books in other religions. That is why we have priests and preachers and also why sometimes a person needs some time to decide which belief he wishes to follow.

It is funny and strange how an honourable man such as Mr. Geert Wilder can produce such a narrow-minded ‘piece of art’ in such a globalised era. I believe tolerance and respect towards differences is taught especially in the West and I have many friends coming from that part of the world who reflect that……but obviously Mr. Geert, you seem to be an exception.

In Islam, love and respect should also be spread to those of different beliefs…..which is why Mr.Geert dear,…..the rising number of muslims in your country takes place…..because your government do not see any threats of bombing and attacks from these people.

If you say that muslims are terrorists….which muslims are you talking about?

Please bear in mind, we must differenciate a ‘religion’ and its ‘practitioner’. Religions are for example Islam, Christian, Catholic…and the practitioners are Muslims, Christians, Catholics….

Now….people usually relate the practitioner to the religion…..however…..do all practitioners reflect the characteristics and the teachings of their religion ?

I think not……a practitioner can be influenced by many things….because he is just a human being whose character is not just developed through teachings in his religion……but also his family, friends, environment, culture, traumatic experiences(if any)…and so on. Therefore, when a practitioner behaves in a certain way….we cannot directly say that what he does is always in accordance with his religion because people have different interpretations of their religions due to those web of influences.

Other than that…..remember that sometimes people like to use the name of their religions as an excuse for their wrong doings…..and for this…..Mr.Wilder…..you must open your eyes very wide because many practitioners from religions other than Islam do this, too…….but again….their actions do not represent the real teachings in their religions so it wouldn’t be wise to generalize.

In terms of the surahs and the verses Mr. Wilder……you might want to consult those who know more about how to interpret the Koran…it is not wise to cut up bits and pieces and talk about something you do not know of……even the muslims are warned to be careful when they interpret the Koran……only those who have the knowledge and wisdom are able to understand and interpret correctly. Please bear in mind that all religion preaches about love and compassion…….for if that is untrue…..the religion will not have followers of good people…….

If you love peace, then let’s create peace….start by not contaminating peace itself with irresponsible behaviours and spreading invalid truths….

May peace and wisdom be with you always, Sir.

Warm regards,

ayu =)

‘daripada sakit hati…lebih baik sakit gigi….’

Hi, r u familiar with that song ?…….yes, anyone who is not ashamed of admitting that dangdut is the music of our country would shamelessly say….’Who doesn’t know that song?’

Well unfortunately, I have experienced sakit hati (like….erm….so many times hehehe….who hasn’t?…don’t! Highly unrecommended…) and now I am experiencing sakit gigi……… Would you prefer sakit gigi than sakit hati ?

Hmm…perhaps the similarity is that they both put you through hell (ok I know the ‘hell’ word seems a bit dramatic). Other than that, ‘Lima L’ tanda2 anemia starts to appear in your expression….lemah, letih, lesu, lelah, …satu lagi teh apa ya?? (yeah…..I know…I know…that’s another dramatic illustration…eh, tapi bener tau….org yg sakit hati ato patah hati suka kena gejala 5L…..mungkin ditambah sering marah2 if u can’t stand the truth……ato lebih parah neror2…(that was personal experience…ngga…ngga…daku ga suka marah2 ato neror2….but there r some people out there who have enjoyed making me the object of these things). Let’s put that aside…..the topic is sakit gigi, remember !

Sakit gigi…..ya….sakit banget kalo gigi graham udah nyundul2…….mending nyundul2nya arahnya bener and tumbuhnya ga desek2 gigi yg lain. It has been months since my gum and growing teeth hurt. It started with the right tooth and gum……..then the left tooth and gum……It hurts and annoys me so much especially when I have to really concentrate in something.

The strange thing is, yg kiri kok gak udah2 sakitnya……and when I look in the mirror….I cannot see the tooth anymore….but I know it has grown….I saw it a few months a go….where is it now…..has it sunk back in my gum? Ooo….I hope I don’t have to go to the dentist…..their smiley faces look so scary…..their hobby is performing surgery!

I remember in an aikido practice years ago, one of my friends was studying to become a dentist…….I was wondering why he stared at me often…..he always smiled showing his teeth…..so I always returned his smile showing my teeth,too….udah ge er aza kirain kenapa…..ternyata he was interested in the gap between my front upper teeth and he wanted to give me braces. Bayangin kawat2 ituh nusuk2 ke gusi…hiiiyyyy. I said no politely and after that I always made sure when we met and smiled at each other…..I didn’t show my teeth…..My teeth may be cute because they are very small in size and there are gaps in between….but I wouldn’t change it just to look beautiful….well, unless for health reasons.

I guess I have to stand this unbearable pain……I have to keep on smiling even when it hurts inside….malu juga……I remember one of my students asks me, ‘Are u ok?’ and I said, ‘Giginya baru tumbuh’. He laughed because he just heard his teacher’s tooth is still growing while his teeth are all grown. Ya iyalah he is 30 something for goodness sake….hehehe.

Aduh, I have to look at this in a positive way……why am I making a big deal out of this ? Other people are suffering more serious diseases right? Untung gak sakit hati, Cuma sakit gigi…. (Cuma???)…..

If there’s anything that’s more painful than the thrust of a sword…..it is the one thing that cuts no flesh and spills no blood……yet wounds the heart and strikes the soul…..yes…..it’s the tongue. Paralyze somebody’s soul and the victim may never taste the joy of happiness again….that’s how vulnerable the heart is.

But do we realize how powerful  this heart is?

It gives us the strength to live, it helps to support other organs in the body to function properly…….and don’t forget the other heart. This heart is a blessing to everyone’s lives…..giving us the ability to feel non-physical pain as well as happiness…..helping us to balance our logic to produce a more thoughtful attitude towards life………giving us the conscience to empathize with those around us……guiding us through the puzzling labyrinth of life……and making us able to feel the most amazing feeling anyone could ever wish for….love.

The interesting thing is…….the joy in giving love is somehow more satisfactory than trying so hard to be loved. For this, ask a mother who would give the world to her child, ask a father who is willing to take any job just as long as he could feed his family, ask a hero who is willing to bleed for the freedom of his people, and don’t forget to ask a lover who would walk a thousand miles and wait a thousand years for his or her loved ones…….

Perhaps this is what Helen Keller meant when she said, ”The most beautiful things cannot be heard, seen, or touched…..but is felt by the heart."

Hmm…the invisible heart…a simple analogy I would give to people who ask me…..’Why do you believe in God?’ Imagine how real He is in His unseen gift……..the invisible heart.

* Inspired by my conversation with Alex, the Jewish taxi driver who thought I was a nun, then decided to interview me about God on our way to Sydney Airport and asked me to stay to be his wife 45 minutes before the plane took off…

Regret….the easiest thing to turn
to when nothing comes out right like we want it to:

If
I had done that, this would’ve never happened.

If
I had picked a cheaper lunch, I would have afforded dinner.

If
I had chosen the other person, I would have been treated better.

If…..the two-letter word of futility……a device used for
comfort by people who experience regret. In the worst cases, people who experience regret may not accept their own mistakes and look for other people to blame…..some even blame God for creating such destiny.

Well….they say failure is a misfortune but
regret is a catastrophe. Perhaps looking at failure as a misfortune will help
us to survive and look at life in a more positive and optimistic way so that we
never stop trying, while having regrets may deteriorate our self-esteem,
self-confidence, and increase our pessimistic view of life.

Hmm….choices…..that’s about everything life has to offer. Beyond
these choices, lie consequences which will contribute to our fate…whether it will cause happiness
or sorrow.

So…don’t blame God if you are a thief…He didn’t make you a thief…..blame yourself for choosing to be a thief…

" …dan sekali-kali tidaklah Tuhanmu menganiaya hamba-hambaNya." (QS. Fushshilat (41): 46)

"….dan Kami tiada menganiaya mereka, tetapi merekalah yang menganiaya diri sendiri." (QS. An-Nahl (16):118)

Dear mumu,

Today is Valentine’s Day. As usual, those who celebrate are busy buying gifts for their loved ones. These people believe that today is the perfect day to tell people they love how much they matter and the gifts are there to symbolize.

Well, it is quite undeniable that the experience of giving and receiving something is never a disappointment for both the giver and the receiver. They both find the joy of being recognized, appreciated, and loved.

Whether this is something that should be celebrated on 14th February or not is still considered to be a debatable issue. Personally, I have no objection whatsoever with people giving and receiving presents whether it is on Valentine’s Day or any other day.

Showing the people you love how much you care about them is just one of those rights we humans are born with. We need food to survive, we also need love to feed our soul. I still don’t understand why it is called Valentine’s Day though, because the history doesn’t seem to provide enough evidence on the relation of the death of St.Valentine and the booming Valentine tradition. Or perhaps…..this is just due to my lack of knowledge in this matter ?

Never
apologize for showing feeling.  When you do so, you apologize for the
truth.  ~Benjamin Disraeli